so yeah...im getting my results tmr...and today, i got dumped...agn
best part is, i got dumped at work...during peak hours...best
this time it hurt much more than the previous...ok cannot say hurt...previous is critical damage...this one is immediate death...
i tot i can endure the pain sia...since i expected this ending...i still go and ask chia min to talk to her sia..smartass me...tot im ok with it...afterall, im not...
well, bu si niao wont really die once and revive on the spot...it takes time to be alive agn...so, tmr i will be a walking zombie haha...
i dunno why...it seems tht my gilrfrens(EX-s) likes to dump me on days tht are memorable/meaningful...then this spoils everything...how great can life be?
best part, reach home kenna FAMILY COMBO ah...thx ah, take turns to demoralise me...
thx for today guys, make me cry from workplace to yewtee mrt, yewtee mrt to wdlands mrt, wdlands mrt to my hse, my hse into my toilet...thx ah guys...
anyway all the best for results tmr haha
| 7:32 AM |
Thursday, October 6, 2011
就这样，有过了一天。。。
想与你聊天，又怕你会再次对我冷漠。。。
现在的情况只能两个字形容：尴尬
我们现在到底是什么关系？我不知道。。。
我们还能不能像刚开始一样？我不知道。。。
你还爱不爱我，还是已经为了不让你的家人不开心而放弃了我？我不知道。。。
我只知道，我是真的爱你。。。可能我用错了表现方式。。。
我承认，我从以前到现在都不是一个理想的男朋友。。。
我承认，我有时会胡思乱想，有时甚至管过头。。。
我只能说对不起。。。
我不会当一个男朋友。。。
我也不知道你还有没有把我当成是你的男朋友。。。
我，很失败吧。。。
当然，每个人都会有像我现在这样的心情的时候。。。只是看会不会坚强地克服过而已。。。
我，只是选择在这里，写下武装，做回自己而已。。。
不可一世的我，原来还有这样脆弱的时候。。。
我不知道我写这些东西，到底会有谁再看。。。
我也不知道，写这些东西，会影响谁吗。。。
我只知道，如果我再不来这里发泄的话，我就真地会崩溃，被送进精神病院。。。
我承认，我有神经病。。。
而且，我可以很清楚地说，我的病是没药医的。。。
我不会在大庭广众面前发疯，但私底下最好不要与我接触。。。
我，是个疯子
人家常说，心病还须心药医。。。我的药，不知道要多就才会煮好呢。。。
如果有人再读我写的东西的话，请你们在忍耐一会儿吧。。。
希望，在这里写的东西，有一天会是良性的。。。希望有一天能写开心的事。。。
疯子，上
| 6:55 AM |
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
这种感觉，痛。。。难受得要命。。。
明明知道像那么多也没有用，却还是无法自拔。。。好没用哦。。。
就只会逞强，活该你受罪。。。想找人倾诉，又怕打扰人家。。。
反正在这里写什么也没有人会看，就发发牢骚吧。。。
我好笨哦
我高估了自己
不是不想向你倾诉，是不想打扰你
不是想烦你，只是太想念你
不是恨你，只是怕看见你时会有假希望
不是不想见你，是怕见你之后会更加想你
眼泪啊，你今天是我最好的朋友。。。你已经跟着我2小时了，还想粘着我啊？
我以为我不再流泪了，我错了
你发短讯给我，我很高兴
不过你还是专心年终考吧，知道你压力很大。。。
我，很坚强。。。只限于外表
当我离开这里是，我会再次穿上我的盔甲，戴上一层层的面具
不让身边的人担心
我不是虚伪，只是不想让人太了解我，不想让人知道弱点攻击我
我不想让我关心的人知道我关心他，不想给他们压力
我不想活在世界上。。。不过我不会自杀，因为那样会对不起我的父母
我不想与人打交道，只怕有多了一个人竟如我的圈圈，得让我烦他们
我自夸，因为我脆弱
我自大，因为我自卑
我无赖，因为不想在伤害任何人
我不是伟大，只是不想让人操不必要的心
我，只是一个凡人
学弟妹面前，我是黑面神
家人面前，我是开朗的小弟
朋友面前，我是开心果
在镜子面前，我是虚无
黄耀苇，你很没用唉。。。烂透了
| 3:09 AM |
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Im scared of nth...jus scared tht u dun love me anymore...screw this feeling...
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| 7:17 AM |
Thursday, July 21, 2011
operation success
| 6:58 AM |
Monday, July 18, 2011
its been quite long since i made a post w/o anyone asking me to le ah...wat a feeling...
seriously having so much studies for wat...since the so called education system nowadays only emphasise on results results results, memorise memorise memorise, might as well create robots to do work for us...once programmed jiu can work well liao...students are humans leh
results really matter so much? money really win everything? power is so important? if thts the case, lets just replace every human in the working force with machines, no nid pay salary de then our country will earn more ma...
built so many schools here, got how many really teach abt values? i think one hand can count alr lor...plus the best part is tht the ones tht teach values are jus some teachers, not even the school as a whole...wat kind of humans u wan ur next generation to be sia?
it is because of all these tht nowadays teenagers keep complaining very stress, then the adults will jus go WATS SO STRESSFUL ABT STUDYING crap...u try go study now lor...i see how u handle ur studies...
oso because they nvr teach values all the interpersonal relationships start to mess up at our age...not oni bgr la...frenship and etc...everytime brother here brother there...in the end, FUCKING QUARREL HERE AND THERE WHEN HAVEN GET HOLD OF THE WHOLE SITUATION AND U CALL URSELF A BROTHER HOW WONDERFUL CAN THT BE lol
then nowadays those young couples keep luv u foreva here luv u foreva there...when the guy(or the girl) was held up jus for a period of time of sth else, the other party being bored will talk to 3rd party then triangle start liao lor...
ok mayb im too drama but yeah its somewat true for some ppl out there...not me la...my case is diff...my case is cos im a bastard LOL drop tht tok abt other stuff
then got other case when this 2 person like each other, but ppl beside all know tht the timing is wrong for them to be tgt, but they dun care...jus go ahead then...jus hope tht u all dun cry when u all suffer...timing is important DUH
then when break up alr ah, cfm will complain de ma...i dun mind u all complain to frens la, cos i do tht too LOL but aft u all complain ah, jus drop it and move on in life can anot...DUN COMPLAIN THEN COMPLAIN THEN COMPLAIN AGN...FUCKING IRRITATING U KNOW ANOT...one sec say wat a bastard(or bitch) he(she) is...then next sec say AIYA ITS ACTUALLY MY FAULT...then next sec agn AIYA FUCK THT BASTARD(BITCH) LA...seriously JUS WAT THE FUCK U WAN? U THINK U REALLY JING SHEN FEN LIE AH? jus shut up and fuck off...no wonder he(she) left u...
of cos once agn i would say all the above tht i mentioned is not targetted at anyone in particular...cos im aiming EVERYBODY, and yes tht includes ME MYSELF...
vids:
| 6:22 AM |
Monday, May 30, 2011
after this post i wan see REPLAY DANCE xD
ok today had 2 movie dates with 2 diff grp of ppl...both movies are awesome...HOW I WISH TO SEE PO FIGHT JACK SPARROW HAHAHAHA...
ok didnt post for long time since everything i post seems to be emo stuffs...i've emo-ed enuff le...DUN COME BOTHER ME ANYMORE(FOR SUCKAS)...
and part of reason i dun post is cos the spams on my tagboard...see alr oso sian...
and i oso wan ask, anybody can help me in my studies??? x.x
i would be glad to do wat i can in return for academic helps LOL
actually, i get confuse with wat i want for myself too LOL ok pure randomness...
and i dun get the need of ecp anyway...since i'll still catch no ball in class...oops do i even hav a class in the first place??? LOL
AND I WAN TO CHANGE MY WORLD/MYSELF UPSIDE DOWN...I DUN CARE...
IM NO LONGER EMO...but im a vengeful spirit now...MUAHAHAHA since everything in the world dun go the way i wan to, i shall not go the way it wan me to...HUAT AHHH
